Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Summer Traffic

You have to love the summer traffic in the nation's capital. Usually around the first week of July morning traffic becomes a breeze. Instead of sitting on the same kilometre of highway for 15 minutes you don't even have to slow down to under 100 km/h because the majority of public servants & school teachers aren't travelling into their place of work. I find these summer mornings quite a treat because I can leave 15 minutes later and still get to where I am going at my usual time (which does not in any way imply that I get to where I am going on time!).

With all the blissful mornings we have had lately, you would think I would having nothing to blog (bitch) about, but of course this is not the case. With summer traffic also comes a lot of summer travellers driving our highways... and this morning I wanted to murder about the half the motorists on the 417.

Generally I have the 'I want to murder Quebec drivers' attitude, but this morning I had it out for two motorists from Florida, and one resident from Alberta. The morning began with one Florida motorist and his passenger clearly trying to read a map of the area to determine what direction they were going... I tolerated this action for about 30 seconds, but when the motorist continued to drive 90 km in the fast lane I had to pull a P and get on his bumper until he got the hint. It is fine if you want to read a map, but read the map on the side of the road or before you start your voyage du jour (who knew Timbo's rule for map reading would prove to be effective).

About 3 minutes down the road an Alberta motorist was enjoying a king size cigarette out the window of his 1988 Dodge Sundance... and while this would normally make me shake my head, I practically went into cardiac arrest when he proceeded to fire his smoke out his window along with a half full cup of coffee right in front of the Escape -- are you kidding me?

Finally, as I entered the downtown core of Ottawa, I happened to come up behind another Florida motorist... who I shall refer to as Cautious Carol (CC). There was a bit of construction in the Bank street area this morning, and CC seemed to be so preoccupied with the construction workers that she left her blinker on after changing lanes on Catherine Street. As we rounded the corner to Kent street CC slams on the breaks as the light begins to turn yellow, not red (not that I was in a hurray or anything), and while slamming on the breaks she decides to switch lanes again. When the car comes to a complete stop she is angled across the two center lanes (I swear if I had a Florida orange in my vicinity, I would have fired it at her). To make matters worse, when the light turns green again, she sits there LIGHTING A CIGARETTE (don't try to multi-task CC... you might hurt yourself). I lay on the horn politely, and she whips her head up to look in the rearview mirror... as if to say 'what.. can't you see I am lighting a smoke'.

Honestly CC... park your car and walk to the nearest bar... you obviously need a stiff drink to go with that smoke.

What a morning... I can see why some people are such faithful OC Transpo riders.. if it wasn't for the shitty schedule to and from Embrun, or the fact that there is no air conditioning on most of the buses, I think this morning I could have been convinced to take the bus!

Thank god Timmy's didn't have a line-up this morning or we might have had a scene on our hands!