Monday, February 07, 2011

No more nice Mommy!

So, its official.
I'm not longer that nice Mommy... I'm the 'tough shit. listen to me now. I mean business' type Mommy.

Somewhere between the 'no-no babe' and 'please, don't do that' Mommy, emerged the 'STOP THAT RIGHT NOW', 'THAT IS ENOUGH' and 'THAT'S IT, GO TO YOUR ROOM' Mommy. It's like the latter has always been there, but I didn't realize it was only a simple flick of the switch for ... SHOW TIME!

Last week, as I mentioned in a previous post, was a trying week. E is generally a good kid, and I know all parents want to believe that their kids are good, when in fact some are not, but I really do know that, right now, E is fairly easy going, easy to please, not overly demanding, and listens for the most part, which in my books, makes him a good kid.  However, last week, he was really testing the limits. He was sick, and tired, and I was sick and tired of him being sick and tired, and so, with patience wearing mighty thin, I had raised my voice at him a couple of times to hammer home the point that I was no longer going to tolerate his acting out and most of all his not listening when I ask him to do something or stop doing something.

Now, I can make all the excuses in the book I want, but I know that he is just wanting attention for us, and more specifically me, because he knows my first obligation right now is to his baby brother (for obvious reasons). Its like three months ago E would have killed for more independence and now that I'm willing to give it to him (because frankly I have no other choice when I'm on my own with the two of them), he is reverting back to the 'Help Help Help' phase.

In addition when he doesn't get the attention he wants from me, he has started to do things that he knows are wrong and knows will create a reaction, like dumping an entire bag of goldfish crackers all over the coffee table, or fillng a glass of water from the water cooler and 'accidently' dumping some of it on the floor and then announcing 'uh-oh Mom-meeee'.

Cue out of nowhere: 'THAT IS ENOUGH EMERY, YOUR NOT LISTENING, YOU WILL GO TO YOUR ROOM IF THIS KEEPS UP'

To which I think to myself: Holy shit... where did that come from?
To which E thinks to himself: Holy shit... where did that come from?

Nonetheless he continues to push the limits with one thing after another and I finally snap... put his brother down mid-feeding (much to E's surprise) and march him up to his room, where I proceed to tell him to sit on his bed until he can listen. He defys and says No, and I persist with, Yes, and we go back and forth until he realizes I am not joking, I'm SERIOUS Mommy, and I'm upset. I close the door and tell him, you stay in here until you can say sorry and start listening to Mommy.

The screaming and whining continues from his room, while I watch from the video monitor to see he will do, and eventually (10 minutes later) he goes quiet and just stares at the door.  Finally he gets up the nerve to get off his bed, and opens the door quietly, to which he says in the most apologetic voice possible:

"Mom-mee... I saw-ree"

Talk about knocking me down a peg or too with that line. I wanted to cry just hearing the sympathy in his voice... but then I remember how I use to try and work my parents over with a sweet thing or two only long enough to piss them off again, and so I wisely said in a stern voice:

DO you think you can start listening to Mommy now?

E: Huh? Ya.

Me: Okay then, you can come out. Bring a book and we'll read it together.

Whoa! My first major discipline scene completed.... just like that! I didn't know I had it in me, but now that I do, I'm afraid of how often I'll be acting this one out. Probably only one or twice right? RIGHT?

2 comments:

Erin said...

Good job Sar! I think all the parent experts would say you handled that like a seasoned pro.

chris d. said...

Excellent work, Sara! It is a lot of work, but so worth it. Your two-year-old will be a "big boy" in school in a few short years, and he will be a respectful and kind child who cares about other people's feelings.

I've been there, and am there again. Life with a two-year-old means constant testing of limits, but when handled well, everyone moves on from the incident quickly and happily. I love that you followed up with special book time!